It's just a fairy tale! Please, just a fairy tale!
English corner tonight. This version of English corner is fairy tales. Instructer tells the story twice, Englishcorner-ites tell the story to each other, then somebody's got to tell a Chinese fairy tale (or two) (or three) (Fran, you just volunteered) (I did?). In English. Anyway, today we did the three bears. Now, in case you don't know the Three Bears, I will tell you the story.
The Three Bears
Once upon a time there were three bears, a big honkin' Papa Bear, a middle-sized and rather matronly Mama Bear, and a teeny-weeny Baby Bear. He was spoiled.
One day, Mama Bear made some porridge. She put it on the table. "Ackh! This is too hot!" cried Baby Bear.
"I never learned how to cook cold," Mama Bear said, a bit annoyed, because she'd also found it too hot for her liking.
"Even so, it is a bit too hot, but that isn't really the cook's fault," said Papa Bear. "I have it! Why don't we go for a walk while our porridge cools?"
"What a wonderful idea!" Mama Bear said.
"I don't wanna walk!" Baby Bear wailed.
"It builds character," Papa Bear answered firmly, and that was the end of it.
The bears walked in the forest. Baby Bear complained a lot. Mama Bear got so annoyed that she blew up, and they walked in silence for awhile.
Meanwhile, a girl named Goldilocks came along. Her hair was yellow, but nobody seemed to know in her village that hair often darkens with age. Hers did, and she changed her name to Geraldine. But that isn't really important to the story. Anyway, she saw a house, and her first thought was Hey, there's nobody in this house, so I will just break in and be silly. A little felony always livens up the day! So, with this logic she got a big stick and hacked at the door and...
....it came open! Never expecting a break-in by a strange little human being, the bears never locked their doors. So Goldilocks came right in, and the first thing she saw were three bowls of porridge sitting and cooling.
She tried Papa Bear's porridge. "Achk! Too hot!" She tried Mama Bear's porridge. "Oh, it's too cold!" She tried Baby Bear's porridge. "Why! it goes against my physics lessons. It's just right!" And she ate it all up.
She wanted to sit down, and, not finding the kitchen chairs to her liking, sat down on Papa Bear's chair in the living room. Or, I should say, flopped down and knocked the wind out of her. "Heh-a-heh-a-heh! It's too hard!" Then she tried Mam Bear's chair. She sank down so far she wondered if it would ever end. "Yuck! IT's too soft!" Then she sat down in Baby Bear's chair. "Oh, it's just right!" she cried, and the chair (Caution: Small Parts. Not for Children under 3 years) broke into the small parts above mentioned. Goldilocks landed on a certain part of her anotamy and stared at the label. "Small parts. Definitely."
Falling to the ground had made her tired. She climbed up the stairs to the bedroom. She lay down in Papa Bear's bed. "Am I in China? This bed is too hard!" She lay down on Mama Bear's bed. "Is this water? I'm sinking! This is too soft!" Then she lay down in Baby Bear's bed, and said with a sigh, "Ahhh, this is just right. It hits the spot." Not noticing the dart board with darts sticking in the bull's eye on the sheet, she fell asleep.
Then the bears came home. Papa's first words were: "Somebody's been eating my porridge!" Mama looked at it and said, "Somebody's been eating my porridge, too!" and Baby Bear said, "Somebody's been eating my porridge and it ate it all gone!"
Then the bears went into the living room.. Papa's first words were: "Somebody's been sitting in my chair!" Mama looked at it and said, "Somebody's been sitting in my chair, too!" and Baby Bear said, "Somebody's been sitting in my chair and it broke it, too! Cheap thing!!"
Then the bears went into the bedroom. Papa's first words were: "Somebody's been sleeping in my bed!" Mama looked at it and said, "Somebody's been sleeping in my bed, too!" and Baby Bear said, "Somebody's been sleeping in my porridge and here she is!!!"
"Now, Baby," Mama scolded, "nobody would be sleeping in your porridge. And as for your bed--" she broke off in midsentence as Goldilocks woke up, screamed, and ran away without offering to pay damage deposit.
And they all lived not-so-happily ever after.
THE END
Once upon a time there were three bears, a big honkin' Papa Bear, a middle-sized and rather matronly Mama Bear, and a teeny-weeny Baby Bear. He was spoiled.
One day, Mama Bear made some porridge. She put it on the table. "Ackh! This is too hot!" cried Baby Bear.
"I never learned how to cook cold," Mama Bear said, a bit annoyed, because she'd also found it too hot for her liking.
"Even so, it is a bit too hot, but that isn't really the cook's fault," said Papa Bear. "I have it! Why don't we go for a walk while our porridge cools?"
"What a wonderful idea!" Mama Bear said.
"I don't wanna walk!" Baby Bear wailed.
"It builds character," Papa Bear answered firmly, and that was the end of it.
The bears walked in the forest. Baby Bear complained a lot. Mama Bear got so annoyed that she blew up, and they walked in silence for awhile.
Meanwhile, a girl named Goldilocks came along. Her hair was yellow, but nobody seemed to know in her village that hair often darkens with age. Hers did, and she changed her name to Geraldine. But that isn't really important to the story. Anyway, she saw a house, and her first thought was Hey, there's nobody in this house, so I will just break in and be silly. A little felony always livens up the day! So, with this logic she got a big stick and hacked at the door and...
....it came open! Never expecting a break-in by a strange little human being, the bears never locked their doors. So Goldilocks came right in, and the first thing she saw were three bowls of porridge sitting and cooling.
She tried Papa Bear's porridge. "Achk! Too hot!" She tried Mama Bear's porridge. "Oh, it's too cold!" She tried Baby Bear's porridge. "Why! it goes against my physics lessons. It's just right!" And she ate it all up.
She wanted to sit down, and, not finding the kitchen chairs to her liking, sat down on Papa Bear's chair in the living room. Or, I should say, flopped down and knocked the wind out of her. "Heh-a-heh-a-heh! It's too hard!" Then she tried Mam Bear's chair. She sank down so far she wondered if it would ever end. "Yuck! IT's too soft!" Then she sat down in Baby Bear's chair. "Oh, it's just right!" she cried, and the chair (Caution: Small Parts. Not for Children under 3 years) broke into the small parts above mentioned. Goldilocks landed on a certain part of her anotamy and stared at the label. "Small parts. Definitely."
Falling to the ground had made her tired. She climbed up the stairs to the bedroom. She lay down in Papa Bear's bed. "Am I in China? This bed is too hard!" She lay down on Mama Bear's bed. "Is this water? I'm sinking! This is too soft!" Then she lay down in Baby Bear's bed, and said with a sigh, "Ahhh, this is just right. It hits the spot." Not noticing the dart board with darts sticking in the bull's eye on the sheet, she fell asleep.
Then the bears came home. Papa's first words were: "Somebody's been eating my porridge!" Mama looked at it and said, "Somebody's been eating my porridge, too!" and Baby Bear said, "Somebody's been eating my porridge and it ate it all gone!"
Then the bears went into the living room.. Papa's first words were: "Somebody's been sitting in my chair!" Mama looked at it and said, "Somebody's been sitting in my chair, too!" and Baby Bear said, "Somebody's been sitting in my chair and it broke it, too! Cheap thing!!"
Then the bears went into the bedroom. Papa's first words were: "Somebody's been sleeping in my bed!" Mama looked at it and said, "Somebody's been sleeping in my bed, too!" and Baby Bear said, "Somebody's been sleeping in my porridge and here she is!!!"
"Now, Baby," Mama scolded, "nobody would be sleeping in your porridge. And as for your bed--" she broke off in midsentence as Goldilocks woke up, screamed, and ran away without offering to pay damage deposit.
And they all lived not-so-happily ever after.
THE END
So! That goes fine at English corner. Actually, the version above was my version, the version at English Corner was a more traditional one. And then this one guy asks me, "Why was Papa Bear's bed hard? It was big; it should have been soft, too!"
Tell me how you answer that one. I mumbled something like, "nobody knows," and that was it.
More about the impromptu Cantonese lesson I gave later.
Saro
P.S. Fran did tell us a story, by the way. A version of "Midas has asse's ears," only the hole never grew anything that told the secret.
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